My labour and birth story

If you had told me 5 years ago that I'd be married, own a house and have a baby, I would have laughed but here I am in November 2022 married, owning a house and with a little tiny human that was born in Monday 3rd October 2022.

I found out I was pregnant on the 27th January 2022. I was more shocked than anything else but also scared and worried too. The worst thing about being pregnant for me, was the lack of support out there and having to rely on Google a lot for information. I did zoom antenatal classes with a NHS midwife but found them boring and useless. I wasn't getting to meet other pregnant women and make friends, so Simon suggested I look into mum to be classes.  

We came across Daisy birthing classes ran by The Daisy Foundation, which just happened to have classes near where we live. You do have to pay for these classes though. There was a wide range of classes available for everything pregnancy and Mum related. I signed up for the Preparation for birth classes which was 6 classes to help prepare you for labour and birth. These classes cost me £80 I believe and we're completely worth it.

During my first class, we had to introduce ourselves to the other ladies. There were 9 of us around the same gestation. I told the class that I was petrified of labour and birth due to my fear of pain. Over the 6 classes I learnt how to trust my body, be more confident in my abilities and how to advocate for myself. The classes really helped me more than the NHS zoom classes did and I got to meet other mums who were going through the same things as I was. We would share our stories at the start of every class. 

I was still worried about going into labour and giving birth due to the fear of the unknown. I was scared about being forced into an induction or having a c-section by my consultant due to me having gestational diabetes. I thankfully advocated for myself and stood firm on my decision to have a natural birth. As I got closer to my due date I was worried about everything.

Here is my labour and birth story. Warning there may be some TMI and mention of gore.

Monday 3rd October (my due date)

I woke at 2am to go to the bathroom. I had been having Braxton Hicks contractions most of the day before which I was used too. However, the pain I was feeling that morning was different to what I was used too. That was how I knew I was in labour. The contractions weren't that strong but still uncomfortable. I got back into bed with the intention of going back to sleep but I couldn't due to being uncomfortable. Instead, I got up, had some tea and toast then got a shower. I wanted to be ready incase I had to rush to hospital. I found a comfortable position to go through the contractions in which was leaning over a surface. I'd lean on the sofa on my knees over the back of the sofa. Simon and I settled down in the living room to watch The Parent Trap which is one of my all time favourite movies. I was trying to encourage the production of oxytocin. Sitting on the sofa wasn't very comfortable though so I tried bouncing on my exercise ball. At one point I ended up being sick due to pain. I really don't do well being physically sick. I couldn't seem to keep any food down though I managed some diluted juice. At around 7am, 5 hours of having contractions, I rang fetal assessment but they told me to take some paracetamol and have a hot bath. A bath was out of the question as our bath isn't the easiest to get in and out of. After watching The Parent Trap, we watched another of my favourite movies, The Greatest showman which I sobbed through. During every contraction, I went into my kneeling position with Simon rubbing my back and using my breathing I'd been taught at my birthing classes. I don't think I was doing it correctly but it helped anyways.

I rang Fetal assessment again but they told me the same thing as the first time. My contractions weren't regular enough or close together. I was struggling mentally by now, filled with fear and worry and probably blocking all the important oxytocin. My waters still hadn't broke but I had a show of blood like a very mild period on my pad. I was waiting for the huge gush of water but it never came. The longer I laboured at home, the worse it got. It wasn't necessarily painful but very uncomfortable and I was scared of going to the hospital. I didn't even want to go to the bathroom incase I took a contraction. I was leaning over the table, the sink, the bed, trying to breath through every contraction. I had several cries of "I can't do this" too. For some reason I kept crying that I wanted my Mum, which wasn't going to happen as she died in 2016.

By 2pm, I finally had enough and rang the hospital again and sobbed down the phone, begging to let me come in but I was scared of going in the car incase I had a bad contraction or I was sick or my waters actually broke. As soon as I stepped out the front door I took a contraction and was asked by 2 of my neighbours if I was ok. I had to sit on a cushion and towel with a bucket between my legs for the 20 minute journey to the hospital. I held onto the car door handle for dear life and tried to focus on my breathing. The hospital car park was really busy so we couldn't get parked near the entrance. I practically ran until another contraction where I leaned on a post. I made it into the hospital but had to wait on a lift, having another contraction, leaning over a bin this time while some old hag gave me serious dirty looks then moved away Infront of the actual lift. She ended up blocking the lift. Neither Simon or me had masks on so she probably thought we had the plague or something. I couldn't get to the maternity ward quick enough. I basically threw my maternity records at the midwife behind the desk. I was taken to the corridor to wait which wasn't fun. I was stood on the main corridor having regular contractions Infront of other people.  I felt so exposed.

I was finally taken into fetal assessment with a midwife called Laura, who's husband just happened to work with Simon. She did a check up on me, checked my blood pressure and offered me gas and air. I jumped at the chance to have gas and air. To my surprise, I was nearly ready to have my baby. I wasn't told how many centimetres I was dilated which I was happy about. My contractions were coming thick and fast now and I was ready to be moved to the delivery suite. To my horror I had to trousers or pants on but when I moved onto the wheelchair, I was given a towel to cover my bottom half up. I don't remember the short journey to the delivery suite as I had my eyes closed tight. Once in my room, i met the two other midwives who would be looking after me; Vera and Jane. This freaked me out a little. My sister is called Vera and my mum's actual name was Jane. I picked my position on the bed which was on my knees, leaning over the bed. I used gas and air to help with contractions. I was given water to drink which was much appreciated. All my hypnobirthing went out the window by this point except the breathing. I did have some music playing. Everything around this time was a bit of a blur sadly.  I remember taking gas and air and using my breathing and OUT breath when trying to push and the student checking me. I remember taking sips of water in-between contractions and Simon rubbing my back. I was so exhausted though and felt like I wasn't getting anywhere fast. I don't even know if the midwives had checked my birth plan. 

I don't know how long I laboured for as I had no concept of time by now. Sadly. I had to change my position as baby had pooped inside me and needed to get out as soon as possible, well until the obstetric doctors intervened. I think I had about 2 hours to push baby out before they'd come in. This made me very anxious. I now had to sit on my bottom with my legs in the air. I found this so uncomfortable. I do wish I could have been more mobile at this point but I felt like I was stuck to the bed. I was struggling as well, mentally and physically. By now I just wanted baby out. In-between contractions I had to rest due to the exhaustion. Time was ticking and I was loosing the will. I was fed up of all the pushing. I kept being told to push and push and push harder. I was so deflated ecerytime when baby hasn't appeared.  

I was asked how I'd feel about an episiotomy which is an incision on the perineum to stop bad tears from happening. At first I was against it as it sounded painful but in the end I consented to one. It was actually a little painful even though I was numbed before hand. As baby wasn't coming out, I had to have a vacuum delivery with the obstetric doctor. I still had to push but I didn't actually feel baby coming out. When he did come out he was thrust onto my chest which took me by surprise. I began to sob as I realised I'd just had a baby. 

Baby Isaac was born at 7:43pm on Monday 3rd October 2022, weighing 7lb 4. About 10 minutes after I gave birth, my Dad rang. I answered and sobbed down the phone to him that his grandson had been born. While I composed myself and met my beautiful baby boy, I was cleaned up and stitched up downstairs. My poor legs were so tired and so sore by now as they were still in stirrups. 

Our lives changed forever that evening and a new chapter had begun for Simon and I. 

I'll do another post on our hospital stay and recovery.